There’s an eye captivating moment at every moment. so i’m dedicated to being present. Culturally vibrant aesthetics, I see pictures everywhere. Sometimes I wish my eyes could capture the image permanently. The camera never does it justice. you see, There hasn’t been a day that the sublime sunsets and twinkling star clusters haven’t called for my attention. i am forced to be mindful.
I see the beauty of my home better than ever. nothing is mundane. It quenches the thirst for culture I was missing in foreign lands.
the streets have gotten much busier than I left it. The traffic spans more than two hours, for what would have otherwise been a five minute drive down narrow roads…that need renovation. most of them do. so there are talks of the roads being expanded. I can’t imagine the amount of chaos the expansion will bring within the tight sandy streets as seller stalls rest adjacent to them.
cluttered.
the renovations will destroy a lot to build something better—— the chaos is required for stability…
New years eve in the smiling coast had rolled around and I was stuck. unaware of how to apply the beauty around me. My environment though evidently inspiring, my creative-juice tank remained dry. i was drowning in a lack of motivation to do anything fulfilling. feeling lost because up until then, my self worth was defined by my creativity.
I called my friend, who plays the role of my therapist…he listens, and gently says:
“go all in”
I‘m ashamed. as i find myself daring to wallow in self pity when I hadn’t given a hundred to my passions. when i had not fought through the procrastination to gain discipline and consistency.
he proceeded:
“we’re kinda like seeds. in its germination process, it is destroyed, it breaks. Completely. to grow.”
The Lesson:
“I don’t know if i’m losing myself or growing….”
Destruction is a part of creation. sometimes there is no distinction between the two. It is within one constant flow that molds us. this is my theory. destruction is the first stage in the growth process. allow it.
I see myself within the roads. Parts of me that don’t serve me anymore are shedding off….i feel there is a slow creation of an evolved me. I feel the growth. I’ll allow it.
It’s a painful, long, tender, beautiful process. the journey to self discovery is a perfect chaos. But how amazing the end product will be?
I wrote this in a taxi on the way to my grandma’s house in Fajara, the gambia. spurs of inspiration come at anytime. why don’t you, allow it.
thanks so much for stopping by! flourish and multiply.